How could that happen, some of my longer standing readers might wonder and in fact I wondered myself when I discussed it (with myself) for most of the rest of the day. In practical terms it was easy, I just said no and my husband didn't say anything at all, just turned and took his cane back upstairs. I expected a reaction of some sort when he came down again but didn't get one. We'd been arguing, I'd made a few accusations, rightly or wrongly doesn't matter, and I deserved a reaction, a follow-on. Nothing, almost surreal.
He made a mug of tea for each of us a few minutes after coming back downstairs, handed me mine and shushed me when I went to say something. He said best let it rest and he was off to change a bulb on his car, he took his drink with him. He'd be gone a while, I remember he'd changed a bulb before and ended up with a cut on his arm and dropped one of the fixings which he couldn't retrieve and had to get the garage to do it next day. He cursed then that it was a stupid car for working on. Anyway I thought about what had happened, the argument details faded, they were nothing really, the thing that bothered me was the fact that he hadn't dealt with me.He came back into the house half an hour later, he'd fixed his car and looked pleased with himself. Still nothing was said and later we went out together shopping. We had dinner at home, watched a movie, finished a bottle of wine and I went to bed around 11.30pm leaving him to catch up with emails on stuff he shares with guys online. He came up twenty minutes later, I was still awake. I wasn't going to says anything because I hate late night heart-to-hearts so I just put my hand on his thigh and let it rest there until I fell asleep. It took a while. Truth was I felt un-caned and I didn't like it and I didn't like the way the intended caning had been aborted so easily, like flicking a light switch. It had never happened before.
I woke early next morning, heard P stir and put my hand on his arm, I asked him why he hadn't caned me yesterday and he just said because I'd asked him not to. He said the topic we'd been 'discussing' still had to be addressed and we'd revert to it another time. I told him I'd been rude to him and said some things I wish I hadn't. He said he knew it was heat of the moment, he didn't take them too seriously. God he was being far too generous, it wasn't going to plan at all so I blurted out an apology for being such a bitch and saying those things and that he would have been right to cane me and if he had time would he please cane me later it would make me more respectful and appreciative. He said sure, if I thought it was necessary he'd be happy to. Then he got up and went for a shower.
Phew! I still didn't know what, in my voice or demeanour, or whatever had caused so calmly the abandonment of my caning the previous day but he made up for it later I'll be careful how or when or if I ever say no again.
Stay safe.
Have a fun weekend.
Ronnie
xxx
Ronnie
xxx
10 comments:
Hi Ronnie,
That doesn't sound like you at all lol. Sometimes in the moment we just aren't in the mindset or receptive to a spanking, and I think particularly where emotions are involved or there has been an argument.
I Think P was right to abadon the caning at the time and glad he made up for it afterwards when you asked to give you the closure you needed. I hope the issue that caused the argument is resolved quickly.
Hugs
Roz
I think I'm in shock!
You said no to a caning and P accepted?!
I'm glad you did get the caning closure is important but more importantly you two reconnected
Perhaps he thought denying you a caning was a better punishment than a caning ?
I don't understand the issue or your surprise since that is not that much different from how things go here. a "no" when the emotions are running hot is completely acceptable and respecting that "no" is not only expected but not doing so is not only illegal but potentially relationship-damaging.
Better to have one's head straight and feel deserving and willing when a punishment is to occur. It still ends up punitive, but far more productive. And remember when it comes to things between a man and a woman, "no" means 'no'. So if you say it, mean it, and if you mean it, then expect to be listened to. Imagine saying 'no' and being forced. What would the resentment to THAT look like? This worked out just as it should for two responsible adults.
You saying no to a caning? A pig just flew past my window!
hugs,
Hermione
This scared me and made me a little sick on my stomach. I know how easily all can be lost and I would never want you two to lose it. After your caning, if you get to talk I'd love to know P's take on the whole thing.
Everyone has right to say no at everytime.. And of course to say ‘yes please’ a few later too xD
Roz - Thanks. Air totally cleared.
Morningstar - Yes all's well here now. Thanks.
Glenmore - I'm not sure on that. Thanks.
Kdpierre - It's true but in the past I suppose no has always been taken as a token protest, by unspoken agreement. But this time it was taken literally and to be frank has excited me. My concern was has there been some change between us and I still don't know the answer..
Hermione - LOL. That would have been a sight to see. Thanks.
PK - Thanks for your concern. We'll see on that. Thanks.
Laxmi - I know. Thanks.
Love,
Ronnie
xx
I completely get the anger and no in the moment. Sometimes the anger is in the way! However glad you got the caning!
I think P reacted perfectly, because a No stated firmly, with no discussion, means NO!. A playful NO is totally different. A caning would have solved nothing, as emotions were too strong at that moment.
Perfect solution was talking about the issue a day or two later, and asking for a caning when you were ready to accept it.
bottoms up
Red
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