The Cane I Hope

How was your weekend?

Ours was routine, I did get a brief shopping trip to Cheshire Oaks designer village Saturday morning courtesy of our son needing to go to Chester and I hopped along with him, but that was the only out of ordinary. Elle McPherson has opened an undies store there since my last visit and all the stock is about a third off normal High Street prices so I treated myself to some knickers and a gorgeous suspender belt. Lovely designs and good quality. Saturday evening P's mother came around for dinner which was okay...ish...and Sunday I had to go into the office (well I didn't have to but I chose to) because a Slovakian girl emailed me wanting to buy two (yes TWO!) designer bags from me and she wanted some extra details, I thought I'd impress her with my efficiency.

Oh and Sunday afternoon we set targets for my new weight regime, well I suppose P set them really. I started setting them but P said my targets were unreasonable and not to be so hard on myself I'd just end up falling short (yes, P, exactly, and then I'd have to face your, ahem, penalty) so he fixed some numbers which he thought were reasonable, then he put a tolerance margin in, so if I'm plus or minus a little I wont get penalised. I told him I didn't want the margins but he said they'd stay, then added 'at this discretion'. I must admit P has been very fair and I think it will be quite easy to achieve but there's my problem, you see I want to loose the weight and fully intend to but I also rather look forward to falling short now and again so maybe I'll get some weighted ankle bands or something which I can pop on at weigh-in times without P knowing:)

What's the penalty we've agreed? What could possibly make my devious mind think up such little deceptions? Well last Spring when I lost some weight over a several week period, P took a cane to me whenever I missed a target. Now there was a time when I though I would never like the cane and yes I still have a love hate relationship with it but I am nevertheless irresistibly drawn to its uncompromising qualities. And effectiveness as a deterrent you understand.

We have a real school cane which P bought from a theatrical props shop here and a couple from Cane-Iac, one of which I think isn't really a cane because it's a loop and frankly it's wicked and I had experience with it on holiday a while back and had to safeword for the only time ever. I'm sure the other canes pack more power but that little monster sticks out in my mind.

Anyway if JJB have some suitable weights, I'm sure I'll be due a penalty in the coming weeks and I'm hoping it'll be the school cane because the image of it does something for me even if I regret it's actual application at the time.

Out of interest do you have a particular implement you just can't handle or does anyone have one of these 'loopys' and find it the same (loathseome) as me? I mean the loopy's loathesome not me loathsome.

Ronnie

xx