Friday, 3 October 2014

A Personal Tanning Butler

My husband shouted it to me while I was loading some washing so I didn't quite catch all of what he said although I heard the tanning bit. Tanning has two meanings for me, both of them highly acceptable.
"What was that, P?"
"I said you can get tanned by a personal butler, all day for just £126. You've got to go to the Maldives to get it though."
"Really? We've never been to the Maldives, what is it, some hedonist retreat?"
"Dunno, it doesn't say, just that it's a Reethi Rah resort and they've got state of the art technology to calculate your safe tanning potential. I expect yours would be high."
"That sounds very professional, P, so you wouldn't need a safe word, just trust the butler and his technology to know when you've been tanned sufficiently?"
"I expect so, I'll send you the link."
I got the link later with a short message and a smiley, hoping I hadn't got too excited at the thought of a professional gentleman tanning me from morning to night until I was worn out or 'spent out'. Cheeky devil.

Of course the whole thing was entirely innocent and referred to sun tanning and I'm sure the hotel's 'tanning butler' does it very well. I'm equally sure my kinky take on it would have its appeal too though:)

The actual article was in Times Travel by Susan D'Arcy, I've pasted a bit of it below:-
Travel is becoming an increasingly bespoke affair. We can select our plane seats, pick from a pillow menu or order a candlelit dinner to be served on the beach. But while most of us get excited about a £100 upgrade to premium economy, there is a class of travellers who want rather more: in fact, they require the instant fulfilment of whatever crazy whim has come into their heads, for the simple reason that they can afford it. The hoteliers, airlines and agents to the elite have given us the most outrageous examples. Want to know how the other half travels? Read on.
The ultimate tan
No lobster-red guests at the One and Only Reethi Rah (, in the Maldives. The hotel offers tanning butlers, who use state-of-the-art technology to calculate the safe tanning potential of a guest’s face and body, then come up with a bespoke suncare programme. The butler applies the necessary creams to the guest first thing in the morning and reappears at regular intervals throughout the day to reapply. Price: £126 a day.

Have a fun weekend




Cat said...

This is funny Ronnie...which personal tanning butler would you prefer? ;)

Hugs and Blessings...

Michael M said...

Where can I apply for the position of butler?

an English Rose said...

Hi Ronnie, I am as white as snow, guess which sort of tanning I prefer, lol
love Jan,xx

Anonymous said...

Hey Ronnie an all day tanning sounds great and a personal butler to do it wow. From time to time my wife will give me an all day tanning. She will tan me for a bit then rest for maybe half an hour or an hour then tan me some more. Are we talking about the same type of tanning here LOL.

Roz said...

LoL Ronnie, too funny. All day tanning, and a butler. Sounds devine :)


PK said...

It would be so easy for him to do both! Bronze body, red butt. So simple.

Florida Dom said...

I like PK's idea of bronze body and red butt.


Leigh Smith said...

PK does have a great idea.

Minelle Labraun said...

I like the idea for butt tanning only!

ronnie said...

Cat - The butt tanning butler:) Thanks.

Michael - I'll send you the address. Thank you.

Jan - So am I. Thanks.

Archedone - I'd love to be tanned all day. Thank you.

Roz - My mind went to bottom tanning straight away:) Thanks.

PK - Love it. You should write to the hotel and suggest it:) Thanks.

FD - So did I. Good to you see you. Thank you.

SG - She does have some very good ideas. Thanks

Minelle - Butt tanning the best. Thanks.


Blondie said...

I would take both if possible

Hermione said...

I'd love to have a personal butler to tan my bottom whenever the need arose.


Autumn said...

Wow, with a price like that, I would think he'd be doing more than putting sunscreen on you...perhaps it is *that* kind of tanning!

Enzo said...

Well they do say, "Do what you love and you will never work a day in your life" I'm ready to go apply for this type of Butler position; on a tropical island no less!