Tuesday, 5 July 2011

Pack those Toys when Travelling

I love my husband's sense of humour most of the time but not when he tells me to choose my own weapon.

I showed P a post "Pack those toys when travelling" which was featured a couple of weeks ago on Chross's 'Spanking of the Week', 'Toys always welcome' and he thanked me for drawing to his attention to the fact that he still had to decide what to take along on our forthcoming holiday.

'Oh I could almost pack for you,' I said. And it's true, I know his preferences well enough, shorts t-shirts and sandals, just one of each if he had his way.

'I don't mean clothing,' he said, 'I mean something to keep you in line with while we're away.' I just ha-ha'd and nothing more was said until the weekend.

On Sunday our son was out and as it happened our neighbours were away. P asked me if I could spare a couple of minutes in the garden and led the way down to the shed where we keep the mower, garden tools and stuff. Leaning in the corner was a pile of garden canes of various lengths, thicknesses and colours, the green type as well as the traditional pale bamboo type. He told me he wanted me to help him decide which to take away with us, he might need to cut one down he said, or he might need to smooth any rough edges, he's very thoughtful like that.

I pointed to a short, light, green cane and said I thought it looked adequate. 'Let's see,' said my husband and he drew me to his workbench and bent me over it. I objected that I hadn't done anything and we'd be seen, that we'd be heard, none of it made any difference. Then I said I only had my thin shorts on, which was true they are old and thin and a bit too short and I only wear them when our son's not around but P thought they were excellent as they exposed the lower part of my cheeks as I bent over.

So he flicked the little green cane down across my bum and I jumped and told him it was perfect. He put his hand on my back and told me we hadn't finished yet, he had to be sure he got the right balance so down I went again. He tried five more canes on my posterior, he was only flicking from the wrist and at about the same force with each, so that he could compare, but they still had me oohing and ouching.

He kept three on the bench and put the other two back in the corner. Oh god, I thought, now he's going to want to narrow it down with some more practising but he didn't.

'That's it, we'll take those three,' he said, 'the little green one is perfect for otk, the medium bamboo for regular keeping in check and the longer bamboo (which he reckoned will just about fit diagonally into the case) for if I have too punish you.'

Christ, P, we're going on holiday you won't need to punish me, I thought, I mean it would show what with swimsuits and shorts in daily wear. Anyway I didn't argue because he'll probably change his mind, but I did ask him why we couldn't take a paddle or a nice riding crop or something different.

'Because,' said my husband, 'a cane is quieter and although baggage has hardly any chance of being inspected on the outward trip, it does have a chance of being inspected on the return leg and I don't think we'd want to be standing there in front of some snotty little customs official.'

Fair point, I thought. 'But what about the canes, they'll still be seen,' I said.

'No they won't, because we'll just leave them in the villa, perhaps the next occupants will find a use for them.'

It made me feel funny to think of someone else being caned with the same implements.



Anonymous said...

Great story Ronnie.

Hermione said...

I love the idea of leaving the canes behind for the next couple to use. And how yummy, being caned in the garden shed. I wonder if I could convince Ron to try it.


Daisychain said...

Hahaha, have a great holiday, Ronnie, but I have to say you had me giggling out loud at this bit....
"shorts t-shirts and sandals, just one of each if he had his way".
I just SO gotta see him walking around with just ONE sandal..... heehee! xxxx

ronnie said...

Joey - Thank you.

Hermione - As long as the neighborous can't hear I'm sure he'd be for it:) Thank you.

Daisy - LOL, you know what I meant. Thanks.


Florida Dom said...

Wouldn't u like to be a fly on the wall and see the reaction of the next couple in the villa when they find the canes. LOL.


findingsara said...

Ronnie, P is just ever so thoughtful, isn't he? Now as to the next occupant of the Villa...well if it were me, those "canes" would be holding up plants out in the garden "toute de suite"!!! My husband has started collecting new implements wherever we travel, to avoid the airport issue. I have very mixed feelings about that! Do enjoy the Holiday, Sara

Meow said...

Have fun! I hope the long cane doesn't get used. What a great idea - to leave them behind when you return home.

kiwigirliegirl said...

such thoughtful kind forward thinking husbands LOL. I want to be spanked outside in our pool area, or in the back paddock - bent over a fence or gate! Something about being outdoors! Maybe I should suggest it.

bree512 said...

I just want to know. What would the baggage inspectors do exactly? You cannot be arrested for having implements in your baggage can you? Has anyone every been arrested for that?

Alright! I confess!

Yes, I was going to storm the cockpit with a wooden spoon and I was going to threaten the pilot and co-pilot with a spanking if they didn't divert the plane to Tahiti!

Love your stories about your interactions with hubby, Ronnie.


Anonymous said...

Thank you for a fun post. Enjoy your holiday!!

ronnie said...

FD - Oh, yes I would love to watch. Thanks.

Sara - That's where I'd rather them be:) P much prefers the cane to a kitchen spoon. Cheers.

Meow - I hope he doesn't take it:) Thanks Meow.

Kiwigirl - He's very thoughful like that:) Oh yes ask for an outdoor one. Thank you.

Bree - Thank you. LOL. No, not arrested, I would feel rather embarrassed if they brought out the 3 canes and asked what they were used for with others around.

Elder_Lee, No thank your for stopping by.


Red said...

Wow: What fun to look forward to. P was so thoughtful to try a few out before packing.
But what was all the fuss about someone hearing,when you knew your son was out, and the neighbors away. You were lucky (or maybe unlucky) that P did not take the canes into the house after deciding, and giving you another spanking for your not readily accepting his trying out the canes.
You might need to apologize to P next time the house is vacant, and request the spanking you deserved for trying to avoid this session with the canes. Sounds like a win win situation.